Sunday, 26 August 2007

Coming home

It's 8:30am and I am in Peachland. The bathroom is occupied and I am far down the line for my turn in there. This is what happens when you get 7 people sharing a bathroom. I did get a minute in there to relieve my full bladder, which is why I am able to sit and type and not pace the floor in front of the washroom.

We are heading home today. It has been a brilliant trip and I am sorry it is coming to an end. I will have much to write about once I am home and have given Cooper enough attention to get me back in his good graces. We have had some fun adventures and too many laughs and giggles for me to remember what they were all even about. TT had me in stitches and tears last night. She was a one woman comedy show and I was doubled over and unable to breath at points.

Well, the bathroom isn't free yet but I should get packing and cleaning and the general helping out around here. I think the plan is to hit the road by noon and while I am sad the vacation is over, I am looking forward to sleeping in my own bed, showering in my own shower and giving Cooper a good cuddle.

Tuesday, 21 August 2007

Superbad is Supergood

Tomorrow is the road trip and I am pretty excited about it. ST and I are going to be driving up with TT tomorrow in the early afternoon. JM and his girlfriend S, will be driving up not far behind us. LT and JDub are already up there. JM and TT's cousin from Australia and his wife will be in Vancouver and are going to drive up to be with us on Friday for the weekend. We will also hopefully get to see some friends from Calgary who are going to be in Penticton for Iron Man. I think we are going to have a great time.

I have been cleaning my place because it's always nice to come home to a clean, fresh apartment. It's funny that I'll spend more time cleaning for going away than I will if I were staying home. So far so good though. I should be able to spend the rest of my night tonight relaxing alone before the craziness of being around a group of people 24/7 for the next 5 days.

I am taking painkillers and antibiotics and have been told not to imbibe too much (or at all) so this could put a small damper on my winery tour. Either that or I spend the weekend being a bit loopy (call me Paula Abdul). I have been instructed to drink plenty (PLENTY) of water if I do drink any booze and to take probiotics as well to combat the negative aspects of antibiotics.

If you are wondering why I am taking painkillers and antibiotics, I will tell you. I spent many, many hours in a dentist chair last week and narrowly avoided a root canal. But since the appointment, I have had some pretty serious pain. There are actually a number of reasons I could be in pain but the most likely one seems to be that because the cavity was so deep, the nerve is irritated and inflamed. The antibiotics are preemptive in case she got to the cavity too late and the bacteria got into the root of my tooth. There you have my tooth woes.

Well, time for me to wash some dishes and take out the recycling. It's going to be lovely coming home to such a fresh and clean apartment! I will post from Peachland if I can!

Right, I almost forgot to reference the title of this post. I saw Superbad this weekend and I LOVED it. It really is Supergood!!

Saturday, 18 August 2007

Playing with fire!

This is pretty much a picture post because I don't think I could describe this as well as I can document it with photos. As I wrote yesterday, my friend E and her fire dancing troop, The Cinderbellas threw a fire party on the beach last night. It was so much fun. The only thing missing from these pictures is the sound it makes. It is this crazy loud whooshing noise that is so cool to hear while you are watching.

These two ladies are using fire poi. It's fire on the end on a chain.

This is one of the Bellas eating fire with another dancer in the background.

Here are three Bellas, E is the one with her back to the camera. They are wearing fire fingers here. This is what E coaxed me into trying out by the end of the night. I practiced with glowing poi (no fire - just LED lights) and conked myself in the head twice. There was no way I was trying the fire poi.

Here is E again on the right. Her specialty and favourite thing is fire hooping.

E, fire hooping! It is brilliant to watch. Quite beautiful and fascinating.

I had to add this picture because E is fire hooping AROUND HER NECK! I would be bald if I tried this.

These just make such cool pictures. I actually took nearly 200 pictures of all the fire and glow activities and have done my best to narrow it down to a few of my favourites to post here.

This is just a brilliant picture. E, fire hooping again. I got close enough to her for this shot that I could feel the heat off the hoop.

Ok, so E did convince to to try on the fire fingers and so here is a blurry shot of me pretending to eat fire. As you can see I was only willing to get the flames this close to my face. I do have to say though that it was a fun, cool experience and I can see the appeal. It's kind of addictive. When my fire burned out, I was disappointed but not yet willing to try more difficult or scary equipment.

Here's a (slightly) clearer picture of me with my fiery fingers.

Me again with my fiery hand, coming at JM, who is taking the picture!

If you ever get the chance to go to a fire party and try something out, I highly recommend it. It's a cool experience!

Friday, 17 August 2007

Painting and Peachland.

It's been too long since I last posted. I had a busy week and my down time was spent convalescing. Ok, I just really wanted to use that word but I looked it up and it's not entirely appropriate. No illnesses here just a lot of pain after spending hours upon hours in a dentist chair. I had no toothache before my appointment but now the whole right side of my mouth aches. I finally went back this morning and asked for a prescription for some painkillers. I am finally blissfully pain free for the first time this week. I have a stash of pills that should last me until next week should I need them.

I am painting my bathroom today. It's step one, in making my apartment look how I want it to look. I have this post open and have been taking quick breaks from cleaning out my bathroom and scrubbing the walls to check emails and write here. I am about to start taping everything up now. Hmmmm I should take some 'before' pictures.

My Bathroom is all taped and clean and empty and ready to paint. So of course I am taking another break to write another paragraph.

I am heading up to Peachland next week. This will be the 7th annual Peachland trip. It started in 2001 when JM, the sisters and I borrowed JM's mom's car (for the AC) and drove up to stay with JM and TT's aunt in Peachland. TT was living in Ireland at the time so she missed the first year but otherwise, she's been going up there with us ever since. Every year ends up being a bit different with a variety of people joining us up there. We've had Irish girls, Edmonton boys, high school friends, and a boyfriend all join us different years. This year it's the core group (JM, TT, LT, ST and me KT) as well as LT's boyfriend Jdub and JM's girlfriend S.

I have just finished painting the first layer of the corners, edges and around light switches etc. and I must say I'm not a fan of painting with a semigloss paint. I like a matte or an eggshell that goes on thick and solid. The first coat of semi gloss, thins out and looks terrible. But I am happy with the colour and I really do enjoy the process of painting a room. I have the Once soundtrack on and am in the zone. Of course, then I break and write a paragraph or two. I am going to chug some water and get back to it.

I have just finished the first coat and it is strange how a darker colour can make the room look bigger. The ceiling looks higher too. I am loving the colour so far but still need to do a second coat. I am hoping that I don't run out of paint. It kills the whole process if you have to run out and buy more paint. I'm a complete ragamuffin right now so don't really want to fix myself up to go out quite yet.

My friend E and her fire dancing friends are throwing a fun fire party tonight and that's where I'm going when I go out. Although, it is starting to rain right now and that could put a damper (quite literally!) on a fire party.

I was going to keep this post going until I finished my bathroom but I'm thinking I'll just put it up now and if I feel like continuing the painting commentary, I can start a new post.

Saturday, 11 August 2007

The big announcement finally.

I have learned in funny ways this week that a lot more people read my blog than I know of. For one, I had a message on my answering machine from my friend KK, needing to know what my big announcement is. I introduced that I had an announcement to make and then I never made it.

Well, my announcement is that I am going back to school. I have been thinking of going back for a really long time but the 'what' part kept stumping me. I didn't know what to take. I'd like to get my degree but I also want something that is going to be useful and employable and a degree isn't necessarily that. I would love to go into creative writing but don't want to find myself in another unstable, uncertain career. I love interpreting. I just don't get enough work. I don't want to stop interpreting, just find a second career to do part time while I also interpret part time.

I could go into every minute detail of why interpreting doesn't quite cut it as a full time career but the list is long and boring. It's not fair to just give you the teaser though so I'll mention a few things. No benefits, no taxes taken off, no work for three months out of the year, loads of commuting, no understanding of what it is that we do by half of the people we do it for (the hearing ones), unstable schedules, every December, April and August stressfully spent trying to find enough work for the next semester.

I am single and I live alone so mine is the only income coming in (ok, income coming in is redundant and funny) and I can't have any sort of life because I am just trying to make ends meet.

That's the end of that rant.

I don't want to just make ends meet. I don't want to even just be comfortable. I want to be rich. And I am going to be.

So back to the back to school thing... I knew I wanted to go back years ago but I really had no idea of what to go in to. I like to write, draw, paint, sing, dance etc. I love all things creative and much of my spare time is spent doing one of these things. I just can't think of a stable career in a creative capacity. I also love lists and numbers and order. I just spend less time nurturing that aspect of my personality.

One day last February, I was chilling out, surfing Wikipedia for anything fun and came across the Rockstar Supernova page. As I scrolled down the page, I got more and more excited. It was list after list. Of the contestants, of the songs they sang, who sang them originally, if they were in the bottom three, the top three, what they sang as an encore or to save themselves, and then at the very bottom a graph of the whole thing.

The thing was, that next to me, in a drawer, was a notebook with all of the exact same information in similar lists and even a graph (seriously). I had made my own Rock Star graph. This is where I confess to the world at large that I make lists while I watch reality tv. Reality tv is more fun for me, if I can make a list and a graph of what is going on on the show. If I watch Survivor I keep track of who is on what team, who wins who loses, what the prize is, what the punishment is and who gets voted off. Amazing Race - same thing. America's Next Top Model - you bet. American Idol - of course. I actually think I watch these shows as an excuse to make the lists and graphs.

So sitting there scrolling down the Wikipedia page drooling and exited, I realized that I would be happiest if I could get paid to make lists and graphs and charts and spreadsheets. Give me piles of paperwork and I will put it all in order by date, by number, by alphabet, by size. I will file it, shred it, staple it, paperclip it, photocopy it and trim it. And I will love every moment of it. My personal paperwork is in immaculate order. I invent reasons to create spreadsheets. I write lists daily, of anything I can think of to put in a list.

I decided then and there that I would go back to school and become proficient in all the computer programs that have to do with these things. Windows, exel, word, works, powerpoint, access, spreadsheet. I found a program at BCIT that was exactly what I needed. I could start in May.

May came and went and I didn't register for school. I talked about it. I was excited about it but I didn't register. I decided to put it off until September. I had some reasons but they were all just excuses really.

Along came Jack Canfield and the Success Principles and an unexpected lunch with a friend who I rarely see. LM contacted me over Facebook and said let's do lunch. We made a plan and met a week later. Over lunch, I told her about going back to school and the whole Wikipedia story of how I discovered what I wanted to do. After I finished she said to me "You know what you want to do, is be a bookkeeper".

"Oh, no, no, not at all." I said. "I don't want to have to figure things out, I just want to list and chart and graph them."

"Tell me again exactly what it is that you want to do and why." She said to me.
I explained my passions for lists and order and charts and graphs and paperwork. And she said "Yeah, I'm pretty sure you want to be a bookkeeper."

I figured I hadn't really explained myself very well and let it go. We finished lunch and I drove away not really giving it a second thought.

Weeks later, I was on the Internet, thinking about school and wondering if I could put off going back until January and wondering why if I felt so excited about it, was I continually putting it off. My conversation with LM came back to me and I decided to see why she seemed to think I'd like bookkeeping. I started to do some research into it and it did look like it would be up my alley.

It was this day that I took the IQ test online and got back that I was a visual mathematician. It all fell into place (like tetris) and all of a sudden it seemed so obvious. I called JM, who just got his CGA and is a genius and knows me like the back of his hand. "I'm thinking of going into bookkeeping. Whaddaya think?"

He paused for half a second and then said "I can't believe that we didn't come up with that sooner for you. I think it's the perfect match." He helped me research what the job market is like in Vancouver for Bookkeepers. It's good. He helped me figure out the different programs and classes and which school is best.

Within days I was registered and I start September 15th. I have 4 years to complete the program but I am hoping to be done by Christmas next year.

I also just booked full time work for this semester and got a huge raise. I am on my way! Look at me go!

Tuesday, 7 August 2007

Guitar hero

I just got home from spending my day with JM. We went to a matinee of The Bourne Ultimatum - so much fun!! I love the Bourne movies and it's my favourite capacity for watching Matt Damon. He just is Jason Bourne. JM turned to me very early on in the movie and whispered "I LOVE this movie!" For added effect he shook his fists and grinned maniacally.

We parted ways with TT who had joined us for the movie and JM and I wandered around Broadway and Future Shop looking for nothing in particular. We checked out Guitar Hero because I can't believe he hasn't bought it already. He bought a guitar a couple weeks ago and has been trying to teach himself how to play. He cut out acoustic and went straight for electric. Now whenever I call him and ask what he's doing, he usually answers quite sheepishly "playin guitar."

We wandered down to the Noodle Box (yum) and got some food to take back to JM's place. We watched 300 (which I love) and I talked to the movie and cheered in all the best places. I have found I like to repeat great lines back to the screen when I see movies. I have to do it in the voice the actor delivered the lines in - accents and intonation. I am capable of just thinking these thoughts but it makes JM laugh so I say them out loud when it's just us.

300 spoiler alert (if you care)

So I was saying such fun things as,
"The beasts were clumsy and the dead were slippery."
"Tonight we dine in Hell"
"Give them nothing! But take from them everything!" - one of the best lines ever!
and my favourite lines and moment in the movie after a soldier loses an eye
"Dilios, I trust that "scratch" hasn't made you useless." : "Hardly, my lord, it's just an eye. The gods saw fit to grace me with a spare." (I like to cheer at Dilios's great attitude here)

Near the end when the two main warriors are dying they have this conversation...
Stelios; "It is an honor to die at your side."
Leonidas; "It is an honor to have lived at yours."

I told JM we should say this to each other when one of us dies.

Is it strange how much I enjoy this movie?

After 300, I was getting ready to leave when JM picked up his guitar to practice and all of a sudden I had a burning desire to try it. I don't think I've ever held an electric guitar before. I put it on, JM plugged me in, handed me the pick and I tentatively swept my hands over the strings....and missed them. Oops, kind of embarrassing. I tried again and connected this time. I'd still be there playing if I didn't need to feed Cooper. So much fun.

JM thinks I'm turning into him. He might be right.

Monday, 6 August 2007

It was all meant to happen exactly this way.

Something remarkable just happened to me.

Earlier this afternoon, I was feeling a bit bored and sick of being home. I had spent my morning, running to the bank and Tim Horton's and then drawing a new Cooptown for tomorrow and puttering around my place. I decided that it was time I got out of the house and did something, but I couldn't think of what to do.

I made a plan to go to Kinko's to copy Cooptown for emailing tomorrow and then head to the beach. I was going to find a great spot in the sun/shade and read some Jack Canfield.

To paint a picture of what goes on with Cooptown; I draw it following Cartooning standards of 7"x 7" and then copy and shrink it down to 40% to scan and email out. I generally take a few up to Kinko's to copy in one shot so I'm not running up there all the time. Today I just had the one though. I had actually drawn a variation of this particular Cooptown a couple weeks ago and had it all ready to email out for tomorrow but wasn't really feeling it. I wasn't sure about it when I drew it and in the two weeks since, it hasn't grown on me so I decided to redo it and change the concept a bit. I felt satisfied with the redraw and set out to copy and shrink it.

I usually like to go to Kinko's on (non-holiday) weekday mornings when I'm often just one of a few people there. I really like going to Kinko's, it's that whole paper, pen, copier, cutting, stapling, paper-clipping thing I've got going on. The whole trip to Kinko's today was a mild ordeal. By mild ordeal, I really do mean mild - there wasn't any parking, there were lots of people there and the copier I chose to use had grainy, beige paper in it, which wouldn't work at all. Of course I didn't realize the paper problem until after I had made a copy.

I moved to a different machine and re-copied Cooptown wondering the whole time if I was going to say something to the staff about the grainy beige paper and not pay for that one copy I made. I moved over to the cutter and trimmed both Cooptown copies and decided that it was only 10 cents and I could use the beige Coop for a magnet or something.

I paid, I left, I drove to the beach. I had my windows down and good music on and I felt like sharing my day with someone and not spending it alone. I called my sis to see if her and her boyfriend wanted to join me at the beach. They were doing their own thing and I felt a pang of envy that they had each other's company and a beautiful patio to sit on. Who needs the beach when you have a deck like that. My other sister and friends are either out of town or live an hour away. I decided to make the most of beaching it alone. It would be me and Jack Canfield.

I couldn't find any parking. The whole world decided to go to the beach today. I drove once all the way down the beach and once all the way back looking for a place to park. I was uber-aware that I was alone and I was feeling progressively sadder and sadder. I decided to cut my losses and head back towards home. I could walk down to the beach closer to home or find a park somewhere. As I drove home, I felt really lonely. I spent the day alone on Saturday and didn't feel lonely but today I was feeling alone and lonely. No fun at all. I fought off a tear and changed the music in my car to something more upbeat.

I got home, walked in the door and for something to do to keep me distracted, I decided to scan Cooptown into the computer and get it ready for tomorrow. I grabbed the envelope I had taken to Kinko's, opened it up and peered inside. There were my two 40% copies. One white, one beige. No original. Fuck.

I know I said I like to go to Kinko's but I really didn't want to go back. I stood for a second considering my options. I could call them, see if it's still there and have them put it aside for me. Or I could just go up there and get it. I should tell you here that I am cautiously possessive of my Cooptowns. I don't post them on here or my facebook page because you hand over the rights of what you post to Google or Yahoo or whatever company owns the site.

I decided to get it over with and feeling even more frustrated now, I ran back down to my car and drove back up to Kinko's. The whole drive I was trying to channel Success Principle #6 Become an Inverse Paranoid. The world is out to do me good. The world is out to do me good. The world is out to do me good.

The other and even bigger problem here is that I was feeling embarrassed about someone seeing Cooptown. I know I send it out to 60-something people every week but they are people who know me and either love me or have requested Cooptown. I send Cooptown out to my 'safe-list' of people that I trust to not make fun of me. I was worried that some stranger would find Coop and laugh at it and show it around Kinko's making fun of it. (I get that this is insanely unrealistic) I was afraid that I would walk into Kinko's to claim Cooptown and everyone would look at me and giggle behind my back at the grown woman who draws like a kid and thinks she's an artist and cartoonist. I am obviously harbouring some fears around Cooptown here.

There were parking spots this time and it was much less busy inside. I went to the copier I had used and opened it up. Empty. I asked the girl working there if anyone had turned something in. No one had. She asked what it was and I tried to sound confident as I said "a cartoon".

I walked back over to the copier and a man nearby asked if I'd lost something. I said yes and as he reached for a piece of upturned paper, he paused and asked "what is it?". Again, I tried to sound confident as I said, "A cartoon."

"This is it then." he said as he turned it over and handed it to me. I thanked him and started to walk away. He said "excuse me, I really like it. Could I maybe get a copy of it? You can use my copy card" and he reached out his copy card to me.

It took me a split second to make up my mind.
"Actually, I have an extra copy here." I reached into my envelope and pulled out the grainy beige copy and handed it over to him.

"Thank you. Are you the author?"

"Yes, I am."

"I'd like to meet you then. I'm so-and-so" He said his name and extended his hand.

I introduced myself and shook his hand and he said,
"I am writing a book and I would love to include this in it. May I?"

"That depends, what is your book?"

"I am writing about my life. The book is called Lost and Found and it is about how I lost myself in alcoholism and found myself again through AA. It is a day to day account of what happens in my life and I would love to include your cartoon in my book."

Cautiously Possessive stepped in and said "I am so glad you like my comic. I am going through the steps to get published myself and am not sure about the copyright for including it in your book."

"No problem, I understand. I appreciate you giving me a copy and will just keep it for personal use then. Thank you."

"Thank you too."

I had been so worried about someone finding Cooptown and not liking it that it hadn't occurred to me that someone would find it and like it. I didn't expect to find a 'moment' when I went back to Kinko's, but this stranger was open and vunerable with me. It was an authentic moment and it touched me. I had a tear on the drive home for entirely different reasons this time. I didn't feel so lonely after all. Success Principle #5 is believe in yourself. I think I finally got today that it also means believe in what you do.

Sunday, 5 August 2007

Muscles are hard to write on.

I forgot to mention in yesterday's post that my P-Mate night ended with me signing some guy's six pack. And I'm talking the abdomen kind not the Kokanee kind.

I was walking home and on the corner in front of my building there was a group of young guys hanging around. I crossed to the other sidewalk like any street savvy, city girl would do and as I did one guy broke away from the pack and said "excuse me, could you sign my abdomen?"

Well, what is a girl to do. Savvy took a hike and I grabbed the sharpie that was offered to me and leaned over to scrawl my name across an incredibly smooth and well defined six pack. His friends gathered round, cheered and took a picture. They bid me well and went back to their scavenger hunt list. I wished them luck and said good night.

Saturday, 4 August 2007

Whoo hoo the official 100th!

Yay me! 100 posts!

Ok, now that that is out of the way again, on to more interesting news. I know I said I had a big announcement to make but I also have something way more interesting than that news.

I peed standing up last night! It was a brand new experience for me and one of the strangest things I've ever done (yes, I've lived a fairly tame life). It was the assist of the P-Mate that made this bizarre experience possible.

It is a disposable "funnel" that allows women the freedom to pee standing up. A friend of ours works at the company that is marketing the P-Mate and they held a 'guerrilla media event' at a local pub last night. My sister and I went along for the fun and support of it all.

I wasn't so sure I'd try it out though. It wasn't until I was on my way to the toilet and walked past my sister who grabbed my arm and said "I tried it! It was totally trippy!" that I really considered that I might try it. If she could do it, I could do it too!

I walked toward the washrooms thinking, "Well, I am here to support the P-Mate...I suppose I should try it."

They had switched the men's and women's washrooms to give us ladies the choice and full experience of a urinal if we were so inclined. There was only one stall and someone in it already. She began to pee just as I walked in. I stood in there, looking around at the alien territory that is a men's washroom, waiting my turn for the privacy of a stall and the security of a little metal lock. There was no way I was using a urinal. There were no speakers in the bathroom and the only sound was the girl ahead of me peeing. And she was totally standing (you can tell - it's a completely different sound).

It was then that I truly thought I could give it a try....but only if nobody came into the bathroom before I started...I didn't want to stand there unable to pee, making some other girl wait and then have to listen to me. I'm told this type of pee-fright is common among men at urinals.
The girl ahead of me finished peeing and came out of the stall looking somewhat sheepish. We made oddly un-awkward small talk about this crazy experience as I backed into the stall and she washed her hands. I was surprised to find myself unwrapping a P-Mate and facing the toilet as I unzipped my pants. Was I seriously about to do this?

Yes, I was!

It was wild!
I don't think it's something that I'd like to do all the time. I have a lot more practice and years of experience sitting down to pee or squatting when I have to and while peeing standing up was a fascinating novelty, I think I prefer sitting down.
I think if one of the goals is to level the peeing field for the sexes, this doesn't really do that. Women would have to practice and get used to it first. Plus, even with the P-Mate, we can't just unzip, whip it out, pee and be done. Ladies would still need to unzip and lower their pants a bit, get the 'funnel' ready, put it in place, pee, figure out how to remove the P-Mate without dripping pee everywhere and then figure out how and where to get rid of it. Until you get the hang of it (pun intended) it's not entirely tidy and then there's the environmental aspect. For every pee you'd be using and discarding a cardboard 'boat'.
Having said all of that I could see where I'd like to use this thing...traveling in less developed countries for one. Outhouses and port-a-potties for another. Camping, maybe. At home when I am bored or want to feel powerful like a man! And I thought penis envy was a fantasy myth made up by men, to make themselves feel better for having their junk all on the outside and not neatly tucked away like girls.
Who knows if the P-Mate will find it's market. I almost think that the people most likely to use it are also the people least likely to use it. Travellers and campers seem to be pretty environmentally friendly and the P-Mate might not be worth the waste (again, pun intended).

Friday, 3 August 2007

Oops, we're at 99 now.

So as I joyfully celebrated the last post as my 100th, it turns out that it was actually only my 98th post. The webpage that I see after I sign in tells me how many posts there are and it takes into account saved drafts that were never published. So in fact this is my 99th post and I can recreate the excitement next time for the 100th.

I had signed in today with the intention of making a big announcement, but since the next post will be 100, I think I'll hold off and keep my news until then. This will just be my teaser announcement. I have big news y'all.

hmmmm, now I don't know what to write about. So instead of writing anything I am going to share something fun from someone else. The website is xkcd - A webcomic of romance, sarcasm math and language by Randall Munroe. I check it daily and generally enjoy it quite a bit. I have learned over the recent months that I am way more of a geek than I thought I was. I mean, I always knew I was a geek, but I really, really am. I like math and numbers and science and Wil Wheaton (

The webcomic is by a geek and it's about geek things but it also about real things and I find there are some I love and relate to. So I am going to share some of them here with you. Here's the link to his web comic if you want to check it out. Hopefully these show up big enough to read...

This next one in particualr speaks to me because I see patterns in floor tiles and my brain always wants to walk in a way that follows them and my social awareness stops me from doing it. When I worked at LL, I used to sweep the floor following the tile pattern. How could I not!?

As for this next one, anyone who has ever walked with me can tell you that I always talk to cats as I get closer to them and say ridiculous things like "you're a kitty". could I not!?